Saying Random Shit to Women

Now it’s no secret that women just want emotions and tingles. Talking about your model train collection will only please your mother and your autism. God I talk about autism a lot. Maybe I’m autistic!


Now before I begin; take this with a grain of salt. I don’t want to be the reason you get slapped or harmed emotionally. Read between the lines. I promise I left you a secret… white space!

This past Monday was a MLK day. I was going to hang out with a girl I met on the street. She had an interesting name that would make you think she was a 4. She was a 6. She ended up flaking on me, oh well can’t be bothered. She had better shit to do.

I was driving around just thinking to myself when I thought of something I found hilarious:

“Ay I’m tryna chill with you on this beautiful MLK day. Lets come together and make a mixed race baby in the name of Mr. Luther himself.”

I sent this out to three girls on Tinder, I was laughing my ass off when I sent it. One was black, she blocked me. One didn’t reply. And the other took the fucking bait. A few messages later, two phone calls, and we’re chilling tomorrow. Should be fun.

What’s the point?

I’m glad you asked! The point of this isn’t that I’m gonna clap cheeks till the daylight. It isn’t that I’m gonna have her suck my big toe and call me ‘Big Papa’. It’s that I didn’t fucking care what I said.

Girl’s just want to have fun. A girl would rather talk to someone than sit by herself, if you’re not autistic, a creep. It doesn’t matter what you say, it’s how you say it and the emotions you bring along with it. This works much better in person, but I digress.

Being congruent with your emotions and saying the first stupid thing that comes to your mind will net you more poon than calculating your every move. As long as you’re not autistic! Fuck!

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